So we are going on day five of Maya being sick. We thought she was getting better yesterday but then last night and this morning she was a miserable cough-a-holic snot machine. This is her just spacing out in her Dora chair before leaving for her doctor's appointment.
One minute she's cranky and tired, the next she seems like a normal bouncy todder. Doc says that its just viral, but I HATE sick toddlers. This past weekend we tried to keep our space from the other kiddies around, and spent the majority of our time inside in the air conditioning. No fun when there's bar-b-ques and what not. I just can't wait for my little Maya boo to get better. When she has a cough attack it just breaks my heart.
While Maya has been napping I have been trying to do some of my last minute nesting for Nolan's arrival.... and of course taking breaks in the recliner to give sweet relief to my aching back. Hence the reason I have been able to do so many blog posts lately in the past few days. Which brings me to some of my inner thoughts today.
Now that we have a boy on the way I have really been noticing just how gender specific our world has become. I mean, I noticed it somewhat when I was pregnant with Maya and it seemed you could not find a piece of girl clothing that didn't have pink in it. It still irks me to this day that when you go to a toy store there is always two separate sides of the store - aisles for boy stuff and aisles for girl stuff (and nothing in between). Sometimes I want to buy an item that doesn't have either blue transformers on it or pink cinderella, for cryin' out loud! Prime example was when I went to get Maya a foam chair and they only had pink Dora or blue Cars. Nothing gender neutral (so annoying!).
When I had Maya I swore that I wasn't going to let stupid things like colours dictate her gender and personality (even though I myself am a girly girl and love girly things, including pink). I vowed that I wasn't going to inundate her with princess this and easy-bake-oven that. I was going to let her play with whatever she wanted, let her read whatever books she wanted, and let her be who she is. If she likes pink ponies, great. If she doesn't, no big deal.
But then Mr. Nolan came to be, and now that I will have a girl AND a boy, I feel like I am really going back on what I had been preaching to myself lately. Case in point: we have these swaddle things that we used with Maya and at the time the store only had pink ones so we got them. At the time I said to myself, "If we have another baby and it turns out to be a boy we can still use them again. They are only swaddle blankets, who cares if our potential son ends up having to wear pink PJ's or blankets? He'll never know the difference!". I went so far as to put the pink girly ones in the dresser drawer in the new nursery. I was planning on packing one with me for the hospital when I stopped and realized if I did this, everyone at the hospital will automatically assume Nolan is a girl. And so, the other day when i was at Toys' R Us I bought some blue ones.
And just like that it turns out I do care what people think afterall. I don't want my boy to be mistaken as a girl. And really if you think about it I have subconsciously been assigning gender stereotypes to my kids from day one. Just look at both the nurseries for crying out loud! They couldn't get any more girly and boyish than that! Who am I kidding, I'm just like the rest of them. Is that a bad thing? Probably not. But I still will be ok if my little boy would rather join figure skating than hockey. For real, I could care less. And if Maya doesn't like to wear skirts and makeup, I would never try to convince her otherwise. But I have to admit I do really like how some things are more boyish than girlish (and vice versa). It's just so cute when you see a little tiny baseball cap or a pink tutu. And the other day I did accept someone's offer to give me "boy" coloured blankets for baby to replace the pink ones that we received as gifts for Maya. I don't think there is anything wrong with enjoying those things, as long as I don't limit my kids and let them be who they are (especially when they are old enough to start expressing their gender on their own). In the meantime, we'll just go with the flow.
But yes, I still hate all things princess and refuse to give my little girl barbies and ten different baby dolls! And I still won't let Nolan play with only Tonka trucks! I might not want my boy to wear pink, but I still don't want him thinking he can only do boy stuff. Just sayin.
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